Reminisce
Nuffnang ;
Thursday, December 18, 2014
I thought
I always thought someone out there would actually care
I thought the talks we had the other day was real
I waited,
Hoping you'll tried a little harder, last a little longer, earning my trust
But you don't.
Ha, how silly I am
I thought you were real,
I thought you really cared
But you leave me with a soulless body
-x
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
Do What You Love, Love What You Do: Student's Perspective on Studies/Pursuing Dreams
I believe everybody has ever come across of this famous quote,
success is 99% hard work and 1% luck
Yes, I do believe that hard work is the key to succeed, it applies to everyone from every stage of life. Hard work not only refers to how many time and energy you're willing to sacrifice in doing something, I would say your attitude while dealing with your work also connected to the hard work. Meanwhile for luck, I guess it would mean your talents, brilliance or whatever you call it.
But I can only agree partially on the previous statement because I personally think that PASSION also plays a role in whatever thing you're about to achieve. Here's a picture of my favorite saying which has slowly becomes the principle of my life.
If I was going to reconstruct the statement that I quoted earlier, the final result would be "Success is 50% passion, 49% hard work and 1% luck" (you don't always see me mentioning numbers! This is odd!) For some unknown reason, I strongly believe that Passion is major factor that keeps one moving on in whatever they're pursuing, be it studies or their desired careers despite the obstacles they face in everyday life. You can always relate Passion with Love, Love is a strong word and that shows how powerful Passion can be in an average person's life. I know some people are not fortunate enough and have been struggling in life because not being able to do things that they truly enjoy, hence the Passion in their bone eventually dies and nowhere to be seen. But trust me, if you still keep that Passion inside you, everywhere is an opportunity for you to expand your inner self.
Though this may not be a big thing for some people, I myself ever been the situation that I almost lost hope in studying. I was in the science stream for 2 years during my high school days, it.was.a.total.disaster. Even before form 4 starts, I know I already going to the wrong path but still, I stayed, thinking that I could cope with it. In the end I found that studying is no longer fun for me, every single day I tried to force myself to digest the syllabus but I failed. Why? Then I thought, maybe it's because of interest? I got none. Not a single thing that can make me improve, attending tuition classes are only to make me realize how fucked up my life is. These were the days when I was being looked down by others, like my very own classmates, friends and even the teachers think that you're at the final stage of a incurable disease. I'm not even exaggerating guys! But I still believe in myself, I trust that I own a pretty outstanding study spirit but I did not make fully use of it during my war with SPM thus resulting a 'so-so' result on my slip. Not going to lie that I actually get a little jealous with some of classmates who did not pay much attention in class and still able to obtain more As than me. From that moment I started to think, hard work is just a piece of shit.
Passion is also the reason why I rejected offer from Matriculation and UNIMAS. I was so immature back in the days that I applied to these places hoping to pursue science for higher education, how silly I am! My parents were so worried and attempted to convince me not to turn down the offers. But see how far I've gone right now, all thanks to my stubbornness and understanding parents. Haha! I know there will be a lot down sides and consequences for every steps that I have made. STPM may not be the best choice but I'm grateful for what I had done for myself, at least, well at least, I am studying things that I actually have interest on and now I have no doubt about my ability in academic studies. Learning things that you love isn't this the beauty of having education?
To sum up this post, I would like to encourage people out there not to stop believing your dream, I know this is a cliché thing to say but if you want to do things you love as a living, then go ahead! Remember #YOLO always.
~should be revising literature instead
but I'm feelin' good after successfully producing a post, ha!
Until then.
Inspired
2:42 am right now.
Just when I had done with some revision, I decided to give my phone a scroll.
And I somehow came across a blog, that truly inspires me, deeply.
Hence, this explains why I'm doing this post,
I never ever thought of abandoning this blog because writing is one of my passion,
though I know I'm still lacking at the talent part, but whatever :P
About school
I'm pretty glad that I chose the new school for form 6.
It was a great start for me.
I feel comfortable studying there, with sufficient amount of stress pressing me,
but overall I'm fine with it.
The best thing about this school is that
They never limit any academic/curricular opportunities or any high positions to the best students only
I like how they practice the idea of EQ > IQ
Which TOTALLY do not apply in my previous school.
Smart students = Best in everything
They keep choosing the same old people for every competition, every.single.year
Didn't even bother about the other students talents and abilities.
Wasted much.
xxx
Anyways
I've always wanted to transform my writing style into something more formal (is that the right word?) instead of casual writing.
Been inspired to do so,
but still,
talent matters.
Until then.
Just when I had done with some revision, I decided to give my phone a scroll.
And I somehow came across a blog, that truly inspires me, deeply.
Hence, this explains why I'm doing this post,
I never ever thought of abandoning this blog because writing is one of my passion,
though I know I'm still lacking at the talent part, but whatever :P
About school
I'm pretty glad that I chose the new school for form 6.
It was a great start for me.
I feel comfortable studying there, with sufficient amount of stress pressing me,
but overall I'm fine with it.
The best thing about this school is that
They never limit any academic/curricular opportunities or any high positions to the best students only
I like how they practice the idea of EQ > IQ
Which TOTALLY do not apply in my previous school.
Smart students = Best in everything
They keep choosing the same old people for every competition, every.single.year
Didn't even bother about the other students talents and abilities.
Wasted much.
xxx
Anyways
I've always wanted to transform my writing style into something more formal (is that the right word?) instead of casual writing.
Been inspired to do so,
but still,
talent matters.
Until then.
Thursday, July 31, 2014
Envious
I hate myself for being envious of everything. (Emphasis: Envy ≠ jealous)
Even tiny little thing can be a reason for me to envy someone.
Sigh.
Even tiny little thing can be a reason for me to envy someone.
Sigh.
Thursday, May 22, 2014
I rule my life
2014 is the year where I turn 18.
2014 is also the year where my life get complicated and tangled. I bet this is not a me thing because probably everyone experienced the same thing at this age.
I don't know how I actually made it to form 6 but since it's a cheaper choice, I'm ok with it. But due to some reason I need to go through a lot of procedures in order to let myself to be in the form 6 list. During the process, many people actually questioned me. "x is a good opportunity, why did you let go?" This is one of the common question that I got asked.
Easy. It's because I don't want to force myself to do something that I dislike. I'm tired of being looked down by other people. I know I can perform better, I have the ability but just not in this field. I can't see the point why you're studying something that you can't cope with, isn't it just a waste of time and energy to try on a futile attempt?
On the other hand, I'm pretty glad that I made an escape from the old place. It's like how the solders need a new armor for every battle. Somewhere that has no black memories. Starting with something new can be really tough, but time will neutralize everything. If you never give yourself a chance to try something new, you'll never know what you can come up with.
Hence, good luck,
xo
2014 is also the year where my life get complicated and tangled. I bet this is not a me thing because probably everyone experienced the same thing at this age.
I don't know how I actually made it to form 6 but since it's a cheaper choice, I'm ok with it. But due to some reason I need to go through a lot of procedures in order to let myself to be in the form 6 list. During the process, many people actually questioned me. "x is a good opportunity, why did you let go?" This is one of the common question that I got asked.
Easy. It's because I don't want to force myself to do something that I dislike. I'm tired of being looked down by other people. I know I can perform better, I have the ability but just not in this field. I can't see the point why you're studying something that you can't cope with, isn't it just a waste of time and energy to try on a futile attempt?
On the other hand, I'm pretty glad that I made an escape from the old place. It's like how the solders need a new armor for every battle. Somewhere that has no black memories. Starting with something new can be really tough, but time will neutralize everything. If you never give yourself a chance to try something new, you'll never know what you can come up with.
Hence, good luck,
xo
Thursday, July 25, 2013
♡130725
Ayo people! Couldn't believe that I'm actually here, my one and only blog, and I'm going to blog a post! I know, its been awhile since my last post. So please don't mind if this post didn't come out so well, you know, blogging isn't an easy task plus I didn't blog for a very long time already :(
I have no idea how I made it here, I have so much to say and so many things playing in my mind but the truth is, no one is willing to listen. I kinda kept all the words to myself but there's always a limit and I just cant stand of it anymore!!!!!! I MUST EXPREEEESSSS MY FEELING. I DON'T CARE IF NO ONE IS READING AS LONG AS MY POST IS PUBLISHED! K done. That's all for my rant. This is why I never want to delete my blog, because no matter how long, how far I go, this is the only place where I can sit down peacefully and start writing (atho I dont do it frequently lately) For me, this blog is my everything, it contains a lot of past memories and most importantly it reminds me I used to be a happy and joyful girl, the girl who has the word "happiness" written all over her face. Yeap that's right "USED TO" means not anymore. How sad.
As I grow up, things aren't the same anymore. Well, maybe its my own fault for creating the false image of happiness. I thought everything was perfect, but no, its not perfect at all. NEVER. Its me, who has been hesitating and never landed a footstep out from the comfort zone. When the world collapses, I tend to realize, oh, this is life, this is how my life should be. Walking cluelessly, I cant see my leg and where's the lane, where I'm going, where's my destination. There are so many junctions pointing to different ways. What makes me even sad is, I'm alone...
People never know what's playing in my mind and they NEVER want to know. Thanks to these people, I learn how to hide my feelings, I hide it deeply, so no one can figure out. Even if they do, I'll pretend as if nothing happens and continue walking on the endless track till I reach my destination. If only there's a place for me...
I have no idea how I made it here, I have so much to say and so many things playing in my mind but the truth is, no one is willing to listen. I kinda kept all the words to myself but there's always a limit and I just cant stand of it anymore!!!!!! I MUST EXPREEEESSSS MY FEELING. I DON'T CARE IF NO ONE IS READING AS LONG AS MY POST IS PUBLISHED! K done. That's all for my rant. This is why I never want to delete my blog, because no matter how long, how far I go, this is the only place where I can sit down peacefully and start writing (atho I dont do it frequently lately) For me, this blog is my everything, it contains a lot of past memories and most importantly it reminds me I used to be a happy and joyful girl, the girl who has the word "happiness" written all over her face. Yeap that's right "USED TO" means not anymore. How sad.
As I grow up, things aren't the same anymore. Well, maybe its my own fault for creating the false image of happiness. I thought everything was perfect, but no, its not perfect at all. NEVER. Its me, who has been hesitating and never landed a footstep out from the comfort zone. When the world collapses, I tend to realize, oh, this is life, this is how my life should be. Walking cluelessly, I cant see my leg and where's the lane, where I'm going, where's my destination. There are so many junctions pointing to different ways. What makes me even sad is, I'm alone...
People never know what's playing in my mind and they NEVER want to know. Thanks to these people, I learn how to hide my feelings, I hide it deeply, so no one can figure out. Even if they do, I'll pretend as if nothing happens and continue walking on the endless track till I reach my destination. If only there's a place for me...
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
12-11-14
It's 1:24 am right now and I'm having this STRONG urge to blog.
So how's life lately?
As for me, I'm currently having holidays. A long one, how long? 2 months long.
Sometimes (most of the time) I'm just too lifeless doing nothing and lie on the bed like a boss till I totally forget what's the day. Sounds pretty serious eh?
In order to keep myself alive in this world, I have made myself to join a lot of classes.
One of the objectives is to improve my grades. I know I've done a really bad job this year. I'm sorry :c Will work super duper hard for next year's exam. C'mon it's my last year in high school! Gonna be a better me and perform my best for next year. Yeah!
Did I tell you I've joined Korean class? ^^ I always wanted to learn this language since I was 13, the age when i gained interest to everything about Korea. Never thought that I still able to learn it again. Initially, I registered the short-term class, which means, holiday class that only last for 3 months. Well, since the teacher said we can never learn much things in a short period so why don't I just join the long-term class. Ya know, I'm pretty serious in learning Korean. Yes, at first K-pop is the major reason why I wanted to learn this language. But after years, I finally discovered how amazing Korea is. By making the first step, that's by learning their language, I wish this could make myself feel closer to Korea.
Btw, have you guys heard of tenchijk from youtube?
Man, he's awesome! I came across his video this morning and wow, things that he said in his video are really impressive. I like how he talks about random topic and love to give opinions for his subscribers who's having obstacles in life. He's a good listener ya know. And one more thing that made his attractive is, he loves God, like A LOT, he's really religious! You can never find a youtuber like him, he's absolutely different from others! It's kinda sad b'cus he's underrated, he deserves more spotlight than other youtubers who talk nonsense in their videos. Anyway I hope he will updates more soon cus I really want to know about this awesome dude :))
That's all for today. Gosh, it's already 2:05 am! How long does it take for me to produce a blogpost? Tsk tsk.
So how's life lately?
As for me, I'm currently having holidays. A long one, how long? 2 months long.
Sometimes (most of the time) I'm just too lifeless doing nothing and lie on the bed like a boss till I totally forget what's the day. Sounds pretty serious eh?
In order to keep myself alive in this world, I have made myself to join a lot of classes.
One of the objectives is to improve my grades. I know I've done a really bad job this year. I'm sorry :c Will work super duper hard for next year's exam. C'mon it's my last year in high school! Gonna be a better me and perform my best for next year. Yeah!
Did I tell you I've joined Korean class? ^^ I always wanted to learn this language since I was 13, the age when i gained interest to everything about Korea. Never thought that I still able to learn it again. Initially, I registered the short-term class, which means, holiday class that only last for 3 months. Well, since the teacher said we can never learn much things in a short period so why don't I just join the long-term class. Ya know, I'm pretty serious in learning Korean. Yes, at first K-pop is the major reason why I wanted to learn this language. But after years, I finally discovered how amazing Korea is. By making the first step, that's by learning their language, I wish this could make myself feel closer to Korea.
Btw, have you guys heard of tenchijk from youtube?
Man, he's awesome! I came across his video this morning and wow, things that he said in his video are really impressive. I like how he talks about random topic and love to give opinions for his subscribers who's having obstacles in life. He's a good listener ya know. And one more thing that made his attractive is, he loves God, like A LOT, he's really religious! You can never find a youtuber like him, he's absolutely different from others! It's kinda sad b'cus he's underrated, he deserves more spotlight than other youtubers who talk nonsense in their videos. Anyway I hope he will updates more soon cus I really want to know about this awesome dude :))
That's all for today. Gosh, it's already 2:05 am! How long does it take for me to produce a blogpost? Tsk tsk.
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